The Songs We Can't Escape

ANNIE
"I Know Ur Girlfriend Hates Me"

This trend of text-message abbreviations invading pop—thanks bunches, Pink and Fall Out Boy—has gotta be stopped! Before we realize it, artists with names like :P, l8r, and tyvm will be signing lucrative, three-month ringtone contracts.

DEATH CAB FOR CUTIE
"Your New Twin Size Bed"

LENNY KRAVITZ
"Love Love Love"

Love! Loooooooove. Love? What is love? Sorry, I'm just incapable of talking about Lenny the Kravitz without turning into an asshole; it's been that way ever since Jeff Jankowitz yelled "Are You Gonna Go My Way" at me during 10th grade homeroom. But anyway: "Love" is a Prince/Hendrix wannabe with hot video babes on speed-dial and sunglasses surgically affixed to his face writing the same damn song over and over again even though no one's listening.

SOLTERO
"Living in the Fish Islands"

Soltero's Tim Howard—he's like a one-man Calla, only way more inviting—takes a break from warm, raspy campfire blues to indulge in some murky swamp tribalism and commune with a tambourine.

WEEZER
"Pork & Beans"

So Oakley shades remain a cool signifier and using the phrase "give a hoot" still connotes old-fogeyism, apparently. But Rivers knows who Timbaland is, so he's not as out-of-touch as he's pretending to be. Worse: I have the sinking feeling Weezer's just never gonna go away.